Somewhere

               

a songfic by Kestrel

 

Pairings: Trowa and Midii Une

Warnings: none i can think of. it's a little angsty, maybe, and a little sad, but it's drama the whole family can enjoy. perhaps a bit ooc? given the lack of extensive monologues by Trowa, the speech pattern may seem a bit off. 

 

disclaimer: i don't own the characters, i don't own the rights to the series, i don't own the song "somewhere" from the west side story soundtrack...heck, i don't even own the computer this is being written on.  oh yeah. []-denotes song lyrics

 

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You knew me before any of this. You knew me when I didn't have a name, or family, or people I loved. I didn't have this life I'm living now. Sometimes I wonder if maybe you were just someone else's dream that found it's way into my head, maybe you weren't

real. Maybe I'm not real. Then I think about you, or as much of you as I can remember, and I realize that even if you weren't real, the thought of you still stirs things in me that I can't bring myself to deny. The years have since given me the words to identify those things by.  Pity, affection. I understood you perfectly, yet I was mystified by you. I needed you. Part of me still does.   

 

                 [There's a place for us

                 Somewhere, a place for us

                 Peace and quiet and open air

                 Wait for us

                 Somewhere]

 

How old were we, then? Too young to comprehend what was going on around us. Too young to understand the unstable world we were born into. And yet, too old to be innocent of the crimes we committed. In a war, everyone is guilty of something. We were no exception.

 

                 [There's a time for us

                 Someday, a time for us

                 Time together with time to spare

                 Time to look

                 Time to care]

 

I'd be lying if I said I never wondered how you were doing. I think about it more than I'd like to admit to anyone, including myself.  If you're still alive, where you are, who you're with. During my short lifetime, regrets have yet to leave their ugly stain on my soul. But

I still wonder what might have happened if we had been in a different place, at a different time. Perhaps we would have hated each other the way people hate to see their own faults in others. Perhaps we would have been best friends

 

Perhaps we would have been soulmates.  

 

                 [Someday, somewhere

                 We'll find a new way of living

                 We'll find a way of forgiving

                 Somewhere]

 

As always, I've come full circle in my analysis of you. These thoughts begin with a yearning for something that could have been, and end with the yearning for something that never was. I cannot force myself to stop thinking of you, and I cannot bring myself to

forget you. I am painfully human.  

 

                 [There's a place for us

                 A time and place for us]

 

I saved you when you felt that you didn't deserve to live.

 

                 [Hold my hand and we're halfway there]

                  

What you didn't realize was that I wasn't just saving you; I was saving my soul.

 

                 [Hold my hand and I'll take you there]

 

Midii…

 

                 [Somehow]

 

I believe that I was supposed to know you…

                  

                 [Someday]

 

I believe that I will find you again…

 

                 [Somewhere]

 

Somewhere…

                

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